Sher (0livetree) wrote,

Today could have possibly been the worst day of my entire life. As if my life needed to get any worse, my mom almost died today because of me. It was over the stupidest thing in the world. I gained some weight so my clothes fit tighter than usual, and my mom wanted me to change my sweatpants but I just didn't want to. I wasn't yelling at her or anything, but she just kept getting madder and madder and after she stopped yelling she was crying. And even though I was mad at her I couldn't bear to hear her crying, my sweet little mom. I went outside to try to soothe her, but she wouldn't stop crying and then after a while..i don't know what happened but it was as if she couldn't breathe..she was trying to draw in really deep breathes but she couldn't...she couldn't speak......she couldn't move......her eyes were wide and unblinking..omg...i didn't know what to do ..the only thing i could think of was giving her an aspirin and some water...i was just immobalized......i felt so helpless...i put the aspirin in her mouth and gave her some water...this all happened so fast....she was able to breathe and i asked her to speak..she said my name and asked me to rub her hand....then i was going to call 911...and she wouldn't let me..she took the phone away and said no no, i don't want to go, i hate the hospital, i'm fine etc. I was going to call 911 earlier but..i didn't want to leave her by herself..i really didn't know what to do. oh god, i thought my mom was going to die...i was crying and screaming while trying to help her..i was hysterical..while looking into her face i thought she was having a heartattack or something..i didn't want to let her go..i just kept saying mama stop doing this!

After all this i had her rest, and i begged her to let me call 911 but she didn't want to and she said she would leave the house if i did. i feel as if i shouldn't have listened to her. i should have called an ambulance or something. but she just refused. i don't know what to do..i feel as if i should tell her doctor about this...i can't even think about what happened today...the way she looked...i really don't know what to do. what should i do? i don't know how i should take care of her. lately she's been feeling very dizzy, and she fainted once at the mosque. when we went to see the doctor he had her get a heart echo and an mri, and some lab tests and she says that everything came back ok, but i guess i have to go and find out myself. she hates taking medicine, she has a couple that she needs to take daily and even the aspirin that the doctor told her to take once a day, she doesn't take. she always says that everyone is going to die and that you can't escape death etc. she's so hard headed sometimes, but i think now i have to make sure that she takes her medication, poor mama.

And then after an hour or so she started laughing, and i ask her what's so funny? she's like i didn't swallow the aspirin that you gave me. I COULDN"T BELIEVE IT! I was like, WHAT????? she was like you've had that bottle of aspirin for a while, I didn't want to take it. She' s mischievous! ;D She couldn't stop laughing. So i found the aspirin that the doctor prescribed and made sure she swallowed the pill. And I thought that was what saved her life. Go figure.

My mom is going to Egypt on Thursday because the son of a bitch tenant that was renting an apartment from us katab 3ad mezawar (a fraudulent deed) and submitted it to a judge, because my mom didn't want to sell him the apartment. I just don't know whats going on in egypt. And what's worse is that he could actually WIN! I told her not to see or speak to that asshole, and hopefully my brother's friend will help us out. Egypt's legal system is really fucked up. How could people get away with this????

I just wish I could go with her, so I can keep an eye on her and make sure she's ok. Screw anything and everything my moms life is worth the world to me.
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i'll be sure to ask my boyfriend about this (he'll be a doctor in a year)... but that really does sound pretty dangerous :(
Yikes! Glad she seems to be ok!
:( that's scary and I think you handled it well, under the circumstances. couldn't you tell ur bros about it or something? maybe they could reason with her? allahu'alam, i'm just glad she is okay, alhamdulillah ♥
Hi sher,

I noticed that you spent some time at SUNY/Stony Brook. I went to school there as well, many years before you, with a girl named Shari Nezami. She was killed before she could graduate, and every year I think about her because she died on my birthday.

Anyway, I did an LJ search for folks who went to SUNY/Stony Brook, and found your LJ. If the LJ icon is your personal photo, you look just like her, and I had to let you know that. Shari was a good person, a brave, intelligent, giving person, and would have done great things for the world if she had lived.

If you like, feel free to read my LJ and let me know if you would like to be LJ pals.